Dating someone with kids who is divorced
Think about your relationship taking on a prominent role and becoming the focal point of your divorced partner’s emotional landscape.
Go to therapy and process your feelings of poor self-worth and feelings of not being lovable.
You are consumed by the need to replace this idol with the reality of yourself that is so much more appetizing.
So you try to ‘out cook’, ‘out dress’, and out do in every way possible the image of your divorced partner’s ex that they hold onto.
These comments can come from your partner’s friends, family members or colleagues who are unaware of how it may affect you.
That is the equivalent of undoing the divorce and rekindling the marriage!
You sabotage your chances of succeeding, because you are afraid that you can’t replace the past.
It’s less about you not being up to par, and more about your partner continuing the process of emotional separation, creating a new personal identity.
If your partner initiated the divorce there is usually a honeymoon period when it’s over, but a delayed reaction to the loss is not uncommon.
You are not fighting a real person and so there is no end to the battle.